Dr Rosemary Parkinson
Realising that your relationship is abusive can be a painful, isolating experience, especially without a support system to turn to. But in the midst of mixed emotions, there might also be a glimmer of relief that you are recognising the truth, and taking the first step toward healing and reclaiming your life.
Who can help?
It is hard to take the first step to talk to someone about how you are feeling. You probably feel confused and can’t explain exactly what is happening to you or why things don’t seem quite right. It may not be easy to find someone to talk to who lets you know that they understand your experience and that they can help you talk through the source of what you are feeling.​
You can look for therapists who specialise in abuse on these websites. Many therapists now work online so you may not need to find someone close to where you live.
Useful websites
Women’s Aid If you are looking for help in supporting your loved one, a good starting place is the information provided by Women's Aid: The Friends and Family Handbook. This site also has a useful page on links to other organisations, and also has a page to search for support local to you.
Refuge Supports victims and advises those who work with them.
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National Domestic Abuse Helpline
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National Centre for Domestic Violence Helps victims of domestic abuse to get legal protection from an abuser and helps the support and statutory services who work with victims of abuse.
SafeLives Is a research, campaign and training organisation helping victims, organisations and individuals responding to domestic abuse, and challenging and supporting perpetrators to change.
Bright Sky Has a phone app which you can download from an app store.
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My research
You can find more about subtle abuse in my article in the journal Trauma, Violence, & Abuse.
Parkinson et al., (2024).
The academic findings of my research with professional women experiencing subtle abuse in their intimate heterosexual relationships are currently being written up for publication.
I have gathered together all the case studies from this website here:
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